There have been several moments in my life where I have thought, “Wow, this could be in a movie.” But never have I felt like I was in a movie more than I did yesterday at my required-for-an-alien-card government health check.
Mr. Kim, who we can only accurately describe as looking like the Korean mafia, rolls up to E.L.C. in the school van to take Amber, Chris, and I to the hospital for our health checks. This is a big day because a completed health check means we can be issued our alien cards and alien cards mean we can finally get Internet at our apartments! Wa-hoo! Now Mr. Kim may look like a mafia man but in reality he’s quite friendly. His English is very bad but he always tries. As we are driving he points at himself and says, “Help,” then points at me, Amber, and Chris and says, “Today.” Initially thinking HE needed help with something, I then realized that he was trying to reassure us he was here to help us today. Oh, really? Wonderful. :)
We arrive at the hospital, follow Mr. Kim to a waiting room area and sit as he is handed a pile of papers from the receptionist. Handing us each a few forms all in Korean he points to the highlighted boxes and hands us a pen seeming to forget that we don’t read Korean. “Ah, Mr. Kim? What might this say?” You can see panic on his face as he carefully responds and points to one box, “Name…” Great, got it. The next box, “Address.” We don’t know our addresses so Mr. Kim writes something (I think it was the school address). Next, “Umm, ah shit…number?” he says. Phone number? Nope. Passport number? Nope. Birthday? Nope. Visa number? After so many scribbles we are still not sure what number they were actually intending us to write on our forms but eventually something must have been correct.
Then the exam started. It was exactly like that scene in Across the Universe when Max goes in for his army health check. I was directed from station to station, room to room. First height and weight, then eye check, then hearing, then some x-rays, then I was hooked up to some strange machine (Chris thinks it was an EKG?), then back out to the lobby where I was handed a Dixie cup, pointed to the bathroom, peed under the pressure of a ticking clock, then back out to the lobby where blood was drawn (with everyone waiting looking on), then immediately following there was a woman checking my teeth. And then it was done. Total time for everything: 1 hour.
We all walked out of the hospital together. Without skipping a beat Mr. Kim pulled out a pack of cigs and politely offered us one, we declined, had a good hearty laugh about the irony of it all and back to reality we returned...
Friday, August 29, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Gold in the Air of Summer
In everything that is learnt or experienced, the child, just like the man, sees doors; but for the former they are places to go to, for the latter to go through. –Nietzsche
Last week I discovered the “library” (aka the top row of a small bookshelf) at school and was pleasantly surprised to come across Essential Thinkers, a collection of work from the well-known “God is dead” philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche. I briefly studied Nietzsche in my Rhetorical Theory class a few years back. Now that I am out of the bonds of university education I can properly enjoy reading his quirky observations and reflections on life. Hence the interjection of the Nietzsche quote at the beginning of this post.
Last Monday afternoon I had planned to meet up with Bruce before classes began so he could take me to the bank to set up an account. Somehow we missed each other so I, the independent fool that I am, decided to try on my own to set up an account. I walked into one of the banks just down the street from the school to give it a go. At the entrance there was a machine printing numbers giving you two options…both in Korean. I had no idea what either read so I just eenie weenie minie mowed it, grabbed the receipt it printed, and sat down to wait. Well I must have chosen the I-have-all-the-time-in-the-world-to-sit-around-at-this-bank option because the other numbers seemed to be changing quickly while my group was ridiculously slow. A half an hour passed and finally my number was flashing. I start walking towards the counter and whoosh I am cut off by an old man who had just been waiting in the bank for a few minutes! Oh nah ah old man, no you didn’t! Suddenly I realized this was why I had waited so long. The printed numbers were intended to cure the Asian disease of pushy line budgers but in reality the numbers were quite a joke….and the joke was on me. I blame my lovely kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Owens, for forever ingraining the importance of standing patiently in a line into my head. All who travel to Asia should go through some mandatory boot camp to train themselves to overcome all that we’ve been formally taught regarding lines and to join the world of line aggressors. Cut in front of me once, shame on you…cut in front of me twice shame on me, right? So needless to say I got in there right after Mr. Cutter. But only to be greeted by a woman who spoke no English. Finding not a single employee at the bank knew enough English to help me I realized I’d have to find another bank and just exchanged money instead.
No worries, the next day Bruce directed me to a different bank with an English-speaking banker so bank account…check. I can now get my flight reimbursement and next week my first paycheck! *cue Apprentice theme song* Other big successes of the week include finding the post office and figuring out my washing machine.
Landmarks in teaching include kicking a student out of my most dreadful class for the first time on Thursday. I had high hopes for tonight’s class as the lead troublemaker seemed to take me seriously after he had to face the wrath of the managers last week but alas. I developed a seating chart separating the terrible ones (all boys), moving them towards the front of the room. That did nothing but put a real sweet girl in tears when she was assigned a seat next to one of the disrespectful boys who is never listening. I just don’t know what to do with that class but will continue to try things until something works.
Pushing naughty boys and classroom management far from my mind I had a fabulous weekend. For under ten U.S. dollars Amber, Chris, and I enjoyed a day at Jin-ha beach just south of Ulsan. After almost three weeks of concrete and tall building after tall building I felt rejuvenated seeing the mountains meet the sea, the waves splashing up on the beach and the hilarious banana boats. Our hunt for cheap seafood for dinner was a failure so spicy chicken it was once again.
After returning to Ulsan we made it our mission to find the infamous foreigner hangout known as Tombstone to have a few drinks. But first we stopped in a popular sports bar to catch the end of the Korea verses Cuba Olympic match-up. People were standing anywhere there was a TV along the streets watching the game. There was much rejoicing, cheering, embracing, whistling and toasting at the big win. It was thrilling to witness. After the sports bar we stop a foreigner to ask for directions to Tombstone figuring she must know…but instead meet a girl who had just arrived in Ulsan a few hours before. She was out looking for some food and wireless but agreed to join us in our quest. It wasn’t long and success, we found it! Twas a lovely (and late) night of socializing with fellow expats from all over the English-speaking world.
Sunday was Ulsan’s 2nd annual foreigners music contest festival in old downtown (Shin-nae) to celebrate Ulsan’s nearly 12,000 foreigners living and working in the city. Words cannot describe it really. Definitely one of the funniest experiences I’ve had in a long time, my abs are still sore from laughing so much. The performers were from China, Japan, Philippines, New Zealand, Canada, Bangladesh, and the good ol’ U.S. of A. I scored a plastic Korean flag, a movie pass and a free jersey reading Korea V-Day. It’s funny because nobody knows what the V-day is all about…even our Korean friends haven’t a clue. The evening was topped off with some super spicy chicken, veggie, rice combo that cleared my sinuses and made me sweat a bit. Who could ask for anything more?
Here goes another week…
Last week I discovered the “library” (aka the top row of a small bookshelf) at school and was pleasantly surprised to come across Essential Thinkers, a collection of work from the well-known “God is dead” philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche. I briefly studied Nietzsche in my Rhetorical Theory class a few years back. Now that I am out of the bonds of university education I can properly enjoy reading his quirky observations and reflections on life. Hence the interjection of the Nietzsche quote at the beginning of this post.
Last Monday afternoon I had planned to meet up with Bruce before classes began so he could take me to the bank to set up an account. Somehow we missed each other so I, the independent fool that I am, decided to try on my own to set up an account. I walked into one of the banks just down the street from the school to give it a go. At the entrance there was a machine printing numbers giving you two options…both in Korean. I had no idea what either read so I just eenie weenie minie mowed it, grabbed the receipt it printed, and sat down to wait. Well I must have chosen the I-have-all-the-time-in-the-world-to-sit-around-at-this-bank option because the other numbers seemed to be changing quickly while my group was ridiculously slow. A half an hour passed and finally my number was flashing. I start walking towards the counter and whoosh I am cut off by an old man who had just been waiting in the bank for a few minutes! Oh nah ah old man, no you didn’t! Suddenly I realized this was why I had waited so long. The printed numbers were intended to cure the Asian disease of pushy line budgers but in reality the numbers were quite a joke….and the joke was on me. I blame my lovely kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Owens, for forever ingraining the importance of standing patiently in a line into my head. All who travel to Asia should go through some mandatory boot camp to train themselves to overcome all that we’ve been formally taught regarding lines and to join the world of line aggressors. Cut in front of me once, shame on you…cut in front of me twice shame on me, right? So needless to say I got in there right after Mr. Cutter. But only to be greeted by a woman who spoke no English. Finding not a single employee at the bank knew enough English to help me I realized I’d have to find another bank and just exchanged money instead.
No worries, the next day Bruce directed me to a different bank with an English-speaking banker so bank account…check. I can now get my flight reimbursement and next week my first paycheck! *cue Apprentice theme song* Other big successes of the week include finding the post office and figuring out my washing machine.
Landmarks in teaching include kicking a student out of my most dreadful class for the first time on Thursday. I had high hopes for tonight’s class as the lead troublemaker seemed to take me seriously after he had to face the wrath of the managers last week but alas. I developed a seating chart separating the terrible ones (all boys), moving them towards the front of the room. That did nothing but put a real sweet girl in tears when she was assigned a seat next to one of the disrespectful boys who is never listening. I just don’t know what to do with that class but will continue to try things until something works.
Pushing naughty boys and classroom management far from my mind I had a fabulous weekend. For under ten U.S. dollars Amber, Chris, and I enjoyed a day at Jin-ha beach just south of Ulsan. After almost three weeks of concrete and tall building after tall building I felt rejuvenated seeing the mountains meet the sea, the waves splashing up on the beach and the hilarious banana boats. Our hunt for cheap seafood for dinner was a failure so spicy chicken it was once again.
After returning to Ulsan we made it our mission to find the infamous foreigner hangout known as Tombstone to have a few drinks. But first we stopped in a popular sports bar to catch the end of the Korea verses Cuba Olympic match-up. People were standing anywhere there was a TV along the streets watching the game. There was much rejoicing, cheering, embracing, whistling and toasting at the big win. It was thrilling to witness. After the sports bar we stop a foreigner to ask for directions to Tombstone figuring she must know…but instead meet a girl who had just arrived in Ulsan a few hours before. She was out looking for some food and wireless but agreed to join us in our quest. It wasn’t long and success, we found it! Twas a lovely (and late) night of socializing with fellow expats from all over the English-speaking world.
Sunday was Ulsan’s 2nd annual foreigners music contest festival in old downtown (Shin-nae) to celebrate Ulsan’s nearly 12,000 foreigners living and working in the city. Words cannot describe it really. Definitely one of the funniest experiences I’ve had in a long time, my abs are still sore from laughing so much. The performers were from China, Japan, Philippines, New Zealand, Canada, Bangladesh, and the good ol’ U.S. of A. I scored a plastic Korean flag, a movie pass and a free jersey reading Korea V-Day. It’s funny because nobody knows what the V-day is all about…even our Korean friends haven’t a clue. The evening was topped off with some super spicy chicken, veggie, rice combo that cleared my sinuses and made me sweat a bit. Who could ask for anything more?
Here goes another week…
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)